Just 72 hours after my last post, my life changed with the discovery of a lump in my breast. I went immediately to my family doctor and from his office, had a mammogram. The first round of tests revealed a suspicious area where my lump was, so another round of testing was required. That testing led to a biopsy which revealed that I have breast cancer. It is in its early stages and I would count it a privilege if you would add me to your prayer list. I have weighed heavily the decision to blog about my journey because I do not want the disease to be magnified, but the God I serve. I don't have many details yet because my doctors are still formulating the "plan", so let me share with you what I do know.
The weekend before my discovery, I had the chance to spend hours with the Lord and if you read the previous post, you know that He spoke heavily to me on the subject of abiding in Him. What I also know is that since January, He has impressed upon me that "my purpose is to know Him, to progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving, recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly..." (Phil. 3:10) I have prayed that I would know Him more and I have prayed that He would not let me miss a single opportunity to do just that. His character attributes are endless and I will never know them completely, this side of heaven. But this is an opportunity for me to know Him as Jehovah Rophe-the God that heals. I know He is THE Healer, but now I will know Him as MY Healer. I am not afraid. I am not perplexed. I am not struck down. I am on an amazing journey to know my Saviour more. And when this battle is over, I will be stronger for it. I love Him more than I could possibly express with our limited alphabet, but the really cool thing is that He loves me even more.
The morning after I heard that we were possibly facing this challenge, I got up early to have my time with the Lord. I was craving comfort "food" so I decided to start with Psalm 91...it is filled with such hope and promise and it is precious to me for many reasons. But before I turned to it, I decided to stick with my regular reading plan, thinking that maybe God would want to speak a new word to me regarding my situation. So I opened up my Bible to October 29th and began to read the Psalm for that day and can I just say I fell in love with my Jesus all over again...it was Psalm 91. You can read it here.
He has been with me every step of the way, continually placing sweet blessings in my path and reminding me to rest under the shadow of His wing. I heard this song today and it sums it up beautifully:
The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to
Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to
It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone
Thank you for praying. I will keep you posted on my deeper discoveries of His boundless love for me and His mercies that are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness.
13 comments:
Renee' and I are praying for you and Byron. You are an incredible person and very much an inspiration to me. I would not have gotten off to such a good start in the ministry if it had not been for your friendship and generosity. We are here for anything you need and the entire MoB will be available to support your family. I am honored to know you and Byron.
I have been and will continue to pray boldly for you before the throne of our precious Lord, Saviour, God, and Healer. Thank you for sharing the journey. I see your sweet spirit and trust in the Lord. You are a shining example for so many of us. Love ya!
Hi Dee Dee,
I came over from Alene's blog. I have prayed for you and thanked God for the strength He is giving you. I am a speaker and I talked about abiding this week. I call John ch 15 the B chapter. He wants us to be aka remain in Him. Ps. 91 is one of my favorites, finding refuge under His wing. You also have Luke 1:45 on your blog...a big verse for me. I have stories about all of these passages! It is clear to me that my steps were ordered to your blog. You hang in there girl. God is going to show you so much about Himself in this. You will see His glory and experience His healing hand on you, His precious child. He is faithful and true to everything He says. Trust Him.
Hi Dee Dee,
I just came over from Alene's blog. She was so sweet to post a link to you. It seems many bloggy sisters are facing cancer these days.
I am putting you on my written list that I keep right here at my computer and am committing to pray for you daily.
Though we don't know each other ~ we are sister's in God's family ~ therefore connected for eternity.
Believing for an miracle!
Cindy
Hello, Dee Dee, I found you on Alene's blog. I just wanted to let you know I'm praying for you! In Sunday school our pastor just started a series on what the Bible says about healing, and I'll be remembering you and praying for you!
I too came from Alene's blog. I am praying along with you all.
I've just prayed for you and will keep you in my prayers.
Your faith in God, our Divine Healer, will help comfort you and bring you healing. It's my first time here, but reading through your blog, you sound like a breath of fresh air to all who know you! :)
Many sweet blessings!
I am so crazy about you! You are such a sweet friend and prayer warrior!! I love you and I am here if you nee anything. I love you :)
You are such an encouragement to every single woman! I'll be praying for you. Please keep us updated on everything.
You have been such a blessing to me. I'm learning through you how to live in the comfort of God even when the situation doesn't look good in our or the world's eyes! I'm praying for a mighty work of GOD!!!
Stopped by to ck on you. You keep crossing my mind. There are many bloggy girls praying for you.
Hi Renee. I, too, found you on Alene's blog.
I am so inspired by the faith and confidence in our Lord that came through in your post. I am humbled as well for I know my response to hardship in the past has not shown the trust you so eloquently communicated.
I will be praying for your healing, Sweet Sister, and for continued strength for you and your family.
I read this post, then went to your previous post that you mentioned. WOW.
The saying is that 'hind sight is 20/20' and it seems that is ALWAYS easier to see God's hand at work in someone else's life, but WOW. To know that God had drawn you into an intimate time with Himself, to prepare you for the next phase of your journey with Him, is almost incomprehensible - except for the fact that I have some hindsight from my own walk with Him.
When we are in the midst of situations, sometimes, we forget how much He loves us, because we are so focused on us and what is happening to us 'right now'. But a witness such as this, reminds us all, again, that He loves us more than we will ever know. He wants us to succeed in His plans for us, and He will take the time to plant in us, His words and desire for us, so that they will grow and be a strength and reinforcement for us, when we need it.
How awesome is our God. He IS faithful.
I pray for immeasurable blessings and insight for you as you continue in your journey of abiding in Him and Knowing Him.
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